Posts tagged "kindness"

Act of Kindness

While going to the shop today, I noticed a young man jump from his car across the street by red light. He went in front, picked up a wood piece (probably with a nail in it), run to the sidewalk and put it down, so nobody would have their tire damaged. The wood was to the side of his car, not in a way of his way of going. It was so kind of him to think of others.

Not everyone notices simple acts of kindness of others, but these kind people are among us.

When we open our hearts and minds, we think of others’ well-being, and the world becomes a more beautiful place.

How can we be kind to others today?

Happiness, Peace and Kindness

By thinking how our mind affects our world and searching the web, I came across this little story. I took it from website called successconsciousness.com. This is basically my view explained and being put in a story line:

The Villager and the Happy Man

By Remez Sasson

In a small village in the valley, lived a man who was always happy, kind, and well disposed to everyone he met. He always smiled, and had a kind and encouraging word to say whenever necessary. Everyone who met him left feeling better, happier and elated. People knew they could count on him, and regarded him as a great friend. One of the village dwellers was curious to know what his secret was, and how he could always be so kind and helpful. He wondered, how is it that he held no grudge toward anyone, and why he was always happy. Once, upon meeting him in the street he asked him: “Most people are selfish and unsatisfied. They do not smile as often as you do; neither are they as helpful or kind as you are. How do you explain it?”"When you make peace with yourself, you can be in peace with the rest of the world. If you can recognize the spirit in yourself, you can recognize the spirit in everyone, and then you find it natural to be kind and well disposed to all. If your thoughts are under your control, you become strong and firm. The personality is like a robot programmed to do certain tasks. Your habits and thoughts are the tools and programs that control your personality. Become free from being programmed, and then the inner good and happiness that reside within you will be revealed.”"But a lot of work is necessary. Good habits have to be developed. The ability to concentrate and to control the thoughts has to be strengthened. The work is difficult and endless. There are many walls that need to be to climbed. It is not an easy task.” Lamented the villager.”Do not think about the difficulties, otherwise this is what you will see and experience. Just quieten your feelings and thoughts, and try to stay in this peace. Just try to be calm, and do not let yourself be carried away by your thoughts.”"Is that all?” Asked the villager.”Try to watch your thoughts and see how they come and go. Stay in the quietness that arises. The moments of peace will be brief at first, but in time they will get longer. This peace is also strength, power, kindness, and love. You will then realize that you are one with the Universal Power, and this will cause you to act from a different dimension, not from the selfish, small, limited ego.”

“I will try to remember your words,” said the villager and continued, “there is another thing that I am curious about. You do not seem to be influenced by the environment. You have a kind word to everyone, and are helpful. However, people treat you well, and do not exploit your goodness.”

“Being good and being kind do not necessarily point to weakness. When you are good, you can also be strong. People sense your inner strength, and therefore do not impose on you. When you are strong and calm inside, you help people, because you can, and you want to. You then act from strength and not from weakness. Goodness can also go with power and strength, it is not a sign of weakness, as some people erroneously think.”

“Thank you very much for your advice and explanation”, said the villager, and went away happy and satisfied.

My note: It all starts with us.

Illusion of Independence

“Oh, I am just going to do it all by myself,” we think as we strive for independence. We keep it in mind that as long as we are independent, we can achieve anything. All by ourselves. Is this a true independence? Can we really achieve things by ourselves and not count on anybody? I believe independence is an illusion. It creates a separation, and we become alone and misunderstood. We separate ourselves from others.

Why independence is an illusion? We all are dependent on each other. Let’s look at nature. Plants cannot survive all by themselves. They need soil, rain and sunshine. Businesses cannot survive by themselves. They need customers who spend money on products they provide. Customers depend on businesses to provide food, clothing, service, great living. We depend on each other for comfort, love, support, care. Everything and everybody are inter-twined.

Once we start to see that our every action creates a reaction, will we be more conscious of what we do and what we create. If we see that we are dependent on each other, will we offer more support and care? Will there be less pain in the world if we rely on each other to make a difference? Well-being, a better economy, a better living all depend on us, as we equally depend on it.

Heroes Among Us

Can you name a few? It could be our family, friends and even strangers. They are always there to help or some of them even will stop their lives and come unexpectedly for a rescue.

I got a flat tire the other night. I put my “blinkers” on. In about 15 minutes to half an hour many cars passed, but nobody stopped. Even a cop car slowed down but did not stop to help. I thought, “Fine, I’ll try to change it myself.” I put “jack” under the car by feeling the “spot” with my fingers, and I started to lift it. Unfortunately, I was not strong enough to lift a car. All of the sudden, three young men (18 to early 20s) stopped and offered to help. They changed my tire in great teamwork. One was holding a cellphone as a flashlight, while I and other guy showed drivers to slow down. The side street was dark. To our surprise, one driver even sped up not paying any attention. A man at neighboring house where I stopped, closed curtains and peeked through the window, as my “heroes” finished changing the tire. They were such a young gentlemen, and I felt so blessed. I thanked them for their help and we parted our ways. I felt so grateful.

There are a few heroes that walk amongst us. It’s a part of their nature to help someone in need. While many people are oblivious to their surroundings, there are those who will do everything to help. As I was going home, I wished so hard that something really good would happen to these three young men, my heroes. The world is such a better place because of them.

Ripple Effect of Kindness

Most people are followers. Do you notice if you want to check out at the store, all of the sudden everybody else wants to check out? If somebody starts to dance in the club, everybody joins to dance.

Today I witnessed something interesting. A young man fell off the motorcycle, as he tried to change lane by the red light. He wasn’t hurt much, just shook his hand. As he tried to lift his motorcycle, the motorcycle was way too heavy for him. He tried his best apologetically looking, but with no success. One middle-aged woman came out of her car to help him. As she came out, the man from the next car came out as well. All three of them lifted young man’s motorcycle. The young man thanked them both, started the motorcycle and left. I thought to myself, kindness triggered other person’s kindness.

If smile is contagious, can kindness be contagious, too? Can we make a huge ripple of kindness with one caring act at the time?

How to Outsmart the Bullies?

We probably all dealt with bullies in our lives: in kindergarten, schools, at work, in relationships. The bully could be a co-worker, a boss, a partner, even an organization, etc., etc.

How do we handle the bully? Do we let them treat us like crap and be a victim, or do we do something about it? Let’s define “bully.” According to Merriam – Webster’s Dictionary and Thesaurus: bully is “a person habitually cruel to others who are weaker.” If we give in to bully, does that mean we are weak? We certainly do not want to choose being that.

Now, let’s look into bully’s mind. There are underlying reasons why bullies are the way they are.

1) They want to bully others around them, so they would not portray themselves as weak.

2) They need to control their surroundings, so they would not feel helpless.

3) They feel good when they hurt others because they do not want to be hurt themselves.

There might be a situation at some place at some time, where and when they have felt as weak, helpless and hurt. Therefore, in circumstances where they can feel power, they will do everything to be in control.

So the big question is how to dis-empower the bullies? How to outsmart them? How to protect yourself?

We need to diminish the circumstances where the bully feels powerful. How?

1) For your protection, never ever show fear and weakness. Bullies feed on that.

2) If possible, completely ignore them, like they would not exist.

3) Find their weak spot, their weakness, their insecurities and see if you can help them with that. Perhaps you can make friends unexpectedly.

4) Put them in surroundings where they feel helpless. For example, be among or make friends with stronger than them people or among those who make them feel helpless and insecure.

5) Sometimes you can kill bullying with kindness. Play on their weak spot. (Just never ever become a doormat. Always stand up for yourself.) You never know, bully might just need a friend, and he may be shocked because nobody was nice to him before.

Of course, different circumstances require different measures. Got to play accordingly. Just got to use your brain to outsmart the bully.

As businesses or organizations go, you can always change them. Nothing is worst for business than a bad word of mouth. If boss or co-worker bully you, – report them or change locations or jobs. Stand up for yourself to be respected. Being bullying is not in job’s description. If partners bully you – either stand up for yourself or leave them. Life is too short to be unhappy. You can always choose to be strong.

Being Kind

Here are a few quotes I found at thinkexist.com about kindness that tell it all:

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” Leo F. Buscaglia quotes (American guru, tireless advocate of the power of love, 1924-1998)

“You can gain more friends by being yourself than you can by putting up a front. You can gain more friends by building people up than you can by tearing them down. And you can gain more friends by taking a few minutes from each day to do something kind for someone, whether it be a friend or a complete stranger. What a difference one person can make!” Sasha Azevedo quotes (American Actress, Athlete and Model)

“What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?” Jean-Jacques Rousseau quotes (French philosopher and writer whose novels inspired the leaders of the French Revolution, 1712-1778)

“Kindness is forgetting yourself for awhile, being aware of your surroundings and being willing to give a helping hand, or gesture, or even a smile to someone who may need it.” (by me, Ineta McParland)

Little acts of kindness make a huge difference. It makes someone’s day. It does not need to be big. Writing somebody a comment card for a great service you received or praising that person, smile at somebody who is having a bad day, rescuing injured and left alone bird or animal and bring to the sanctuary. It does not take much – but it makes a better day for all involved.

Can you imagine how world would look like if everybody would forget about themselves for awhile and take time to be kind to someone else?

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