The Comfort Trap

“Hi, how are you?”

“I’m fine. How about you?”

“I’m O.K.”

“Anything new in your life?”

“No. How about you?”

“The same old.”

Sounds familiar?  Ooh, we are such a creatures of habit.  We love our dull routines.  We get so adjusted, that even we love to hate them.  We LOVE comfort. We love familiar.  We love what we know and we do what we can to stay in the comfort zone.  What is unfamiliar is scary.  What we often do not realize is that in unfamiliarity we can find freedom – freedom from conditioning, freedom from the past.  Yes, ankles might shake from the fear of unknown, but in that unknown we’ll find something new to learn, something new and exciting to talk about, something new to experience.

What if we would take a new route home?  What if we would visit a new place that we never been before?  What if we would meet new people?  What if we would stop comparing new people we meet with our exes and the past?  How our life would look like if we would look at it from the new perspective?  Would we come alive?  We certainly would.  Now, if we would find time to follow our passions? Schedule them, if we have to.  Our lives would be so enriched.  We are worth it!  We are worth to live lives we desire.  Our daily routines are just excuses to be in the comfort – in the known.

There is enriched life that is waiting for us if we are brave enough to cross the line and free ourselves from the comfort trap.  The unknown is like a blank piece of paper – we can fill it with any colors we want, we can choose any words or it can become any shape in origami form.  It is our source of creativity.  What you choose your life to be?

Tags: changing life for better, comfort trap, fear, fear of unknown, inspiration, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, routines, uncertainty

How to Overcome Your Fears?

What are you afraid of?  What do you want to conquer? Who or what you want to be, but your fears keep you hostage?

There are so many phobias out there.  Some of them are reasonable, and some of them are not.  Some fears are for your own protection; it’s your instinct for survival.  It’s great to have these fears.  If it comes from instinct or hunch, these fears should never be ignored.  It’s your inner knowing that something is not right.  You should act on your instinct.  Reaction to them usually is to fight or flee.  Do what your inner knowing tells you to do.  It’s great when that kind of fear keeps you on your toes.

Then, there are fears that are unreasonable.  You don’t know why, but you afraid of something.  These fears keep you from functioning normally in every day life, keeps you away from achieving something, keeps you dead in the tracks.  Examples include fear of public speaking, fear of heights, fear of swimming, fear to succeed, fear of unknown, etc., etc.  You want to achieve something, but these fears keep you away from what you want.  If only you would overcome them, life would be so much more fun.

To get rid of the fears, first we have to look at deep roots what caused them.  Perhaps,

1. Something scared us in the past;

2. We are scared of consequences. (Example:  afraid to look foolish)

3. What others might think. (this is huge)

We might come up with different reasons.  Or, we might not even know what causes our fears.

In these situations, most of the time our mind is our enemy.  We will think of different consequences and reasons not to do what we want:  we might fall from the sky, the bug might bite us, we may drown, we may faint, we may die, etc., etc.  If only we let our mind to come up with different conclusions, it will.  We will tremble and will not achieve a thing.  The key to these situations is to consciously shut out thoughts, dismiss them as ridiculous.

The only thing we should concentrate on is the end result.  Instead of “I’m afraid,” tell yourself “I can do this.”  Do not look at it as fear.  Look at it as a challenge, a game to play.  Then use your imagination how your life would be if you would conquer this challenge, if you would win at this game.  You might make a difference in delivering a powerful speech, you might be able to swim with dolphins, to be able to travel on airplanes like many people do, to go on adventures, etc., etc.  Imagine the whole possibilities and make yourself do it what challenges you the most.  Then, repeat it again and again until your mind will register it’s OK, and conquering a challenge will become a second nature to you.  Practice makes it easy.  You can win at this game – you better believe it.  Mind is powerful.  We just need to know how to consciously use it.

For more help with public-speaking, see how-to-be-brave-in-public-speaking.

Tags: afraid, being brave, challenge, consequences, end result, fear of heights, fear of public speaking, fear of swimming, fear of unknown, fear to succeed, fears, fight or flee, How to overcome your fears, hunch, inner knowing, inspiration, instinct, overcoming fear, past, phobias, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, protection, reasons, scared, self-confidence, survival, the way of thinking, thinking