We get a brilliant idea; our faces light up; we think of end result; we get excited; and then we let it go.  Or, we start on the idea, and then we never finish.  Or, we consult with others, and let others to put us down.

Why is it we let it go so easily?  Why we give up?  Why we do not go all the way?

There might be five main reasons:

1.  We think of others first (responsibilities);

2.  We listen to critics, including ourselves;

3.  We are afraid of consequences (good or bad);

4.  We have too much on our plate;

5.  We procrastinate.

Would it be great if we would go for that brilliant idea?  Would it be great to finish what we started?  Here are solutions:

I know, responsibilities come first when we think of others.  Did we ever thought that we are important, too?  We are important and worth everything.  So, if we wish to work on the idea, we got to learn how to say “no” to people or situations that get in the way.

We share our idea with somebody.  That person starts to criticize.  Do we listen to them and stop, or we persist on our idea?  Also, we can be the worst self-critics.  Our minds can kill any idea with “what ifs”:  what if it is a bad idea and it would be a waste of time? what if…, etc.  In any case, we should ignore critics and fire our self-critic and go for an idea, no matter what.

Third obstacle is fear.  We might be afraid of consequences.  It also comes with “what ifs”.  Think about this… Would we rather make an idea work, or would rather let it be in our mind and do nothing about it?  I would say, better to try it, then later regret the chances we did not take.  Then we see that somebody came up with the same idea, and we beat ourselves down why we did not do anything about it.  The  fear also might be of success.  It’s unfamiliar territory.  We are afraid of what we do not know.  We are worth of every success.  We got to think of the end result, how much we can contribute not only to ourselves, but to others.  That will keep us going.

Next, we might have too much on a plate.  We multi-task, but do not achieve anything.  We think of all these things to do; we get overwhelmed and end up not finishing anything.  At these situations, we got to look at one project at the time, one step at the time.  Do most important things or even the hardest things first.  Look at most difficult jobs as challenges and go for them.

The last is procrastination.  We think we’ll do it tomorrow, but when tomorrow rolls in, we focus on different things and we entirely forget our project.  We got to focus on our target NOW and back it with ACTIONS.  Do it right now – no ifs about it.

What are you afraid of?  What do you want to conquer? Who or what you want to be, but your fears keep you hostage?

There are so many phobias out there.  Some of them are reasonable, and some of them are not.  Some fears are for your own protection; it’s your instinct for survival.  It’s great to have these fears.  If it comes from instinct or hunch, these fears should never be ignored.  It’s your inner knowing that something is not right.  You should act on your instinct.  Reaction to them usually is to fight or flee.  Do what your inner knowing tells you to do.  It’s great when that kind of fear keeps you on your toes.

Then, there are fears that are unreasonable.  You don’t know why, but you afraid of something.  These fears keep you from functioning normally in every day life, keeps you away from achieving something, keeps you dead in the tracks.  Examples include fear of public speaking, fear of heights, fear of swimming, fear to succeed, fear of unknown, etc., etc.  You want to achieve something, but these fears keep you away from what you want.  If only you would overcome them, life would be so much more fun.

To get rid of the fears, first we have to look at deep roots what caused them.  Perhaps,

1. Something scared us in the past;

2. We are scared of consequences. (Example:  afraid to look foolish)

3. What others might think. (this is huge)

We might come up with different reasons.  Or, we might not even know what causes our fears.

In these situations, most of the time our mind is our enemy.  We will think of different consequences and reasons not to do what we want:  we might fall from the sky, the bug might bite us, we may drown, we may faint, we may die, etc., etc.  If only we let our mind to come up with different conclusions, it will.  We will tremble and will not achieve a thing.  The key to these situations is to consciously shut out thoughts, dismiss them as ridiculous.

The only thing we should concentrate on is the end result.  Instead of “I’m afraid,” tell yourself “I can do this.”  Do not look at it as fear.  Look at it as a challenge, a game to play.  Then use your imagination how your life would be if you would conquer this challenge, if you would win at this game.  You might make a difference in delivering a powerful speech, you might be able to swim with dolphins, to be able to travel on airplanes like many people do, to go on adventures, etc., etc.  Imagine the whole possibilities and make yourself do it what challenges you the most.  Then, repeat it again and again until your mind will register it’s OK, and conquering a challenge will become a second nature to you.  Practice makes it easy.  You can win at this game – you better believe it.  Mind is powerful.  We just need to know how to consciously use it.

For more help with public-speaking, see how-to-be-brave-in-public-speaking.