Enormous Gratitude

Recently I met my new friend.  We talked for hours, walked in a drizzling rain, went to the beach in the dark.  We had a great time and conversation.

In talking with her, I realized how far I came.  My attitude towards everything has changed.  Like the saying goes, “Do not look for me in the past.  I am not there anymore.”  It rings so true to me.

I realized all the struggles I been through in the past only made me stronger.  The people who treated me unfairly are no longer in my life.  Some things that I would be dead serious about before, just made me laugh.  I know what I want and nothing will stop me.

By talking to my friend, I glanced into my past and right now.  I came a LONG way. Wow!  I am not afraid of little setbacks anymore.  It only makes me stronger.  Setbacks are just a little building blocks that goes to the top of the castle of our dreams come true.

By summing up all our conversations about life and people, an enormous gratitude filled my heart.  I am grateful for:

1. My family and friends.  You are truly amazing, each one of you!

2.  My health.  Where I was and where I am now – HUGE difference!

3.  My pets who give an unconditional bundles of love and joy.

4.  A peace in my heart.  Forgiveness plays a huge part.

5.  My self-confidence.  Gosh, even my back is straight and I see clearer.

6.  My cheerfulness and positivity.  A simple smile makes the whole difference not only for me, but for others.

7.  My creativity and curiosity.  I LOVE making ordinary into extraordinary, to challenge myself to see in creative ways.

8.  Challenges.  They teach me lessons and test me how strong I’ve become.  It builds a character, so bring it on.

9.  New opportunities that unexpectedly present themselves.

10. LIFE.  I cherish every minute that I am alive!

What are you grateful in your life?

Tags: family, friends, fun, gratefulness, health, inspiration, journal, life, lifestyle, me, opinion, past, people, personal, photo, picture, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, random thoughts, reflections, relationships, self-confidence, thoughts, women, wonderocity

Sorting the Friends Out

People come and go.  Some of them touch our hearts, some of them break them.  Some people come into our lives to give certain lessons.  Some people test our nerves, test how strong we become.  Yet with some people, it feels that we have known them for years.  We can talk to them for hours, and never gets boring.  It seems that they are our soul friends – people who are traveling a similar path.

If we look at our friend circle and people we meet, do we feel empowered?  Or do we feel drained?  Do we feel enthusiastic?  Or do we feel victimized?  How our friends make us feel?

This year, I decided to sort my friends out in a personal life and on social media.  Animal abusers or animal hunters for fun, people who demean women and others are not acceptable in my world.  I had to un-friend some on Facebook.  In personal life, I had to let go of some people as well.  People with chronic victim mentality only drains’ others’ energy.  They are real downers and not willing to change.  Some people just do not deserve to be in our lives.  If they put us down or belittle us, we can choose to let them go.  I did that, and my life became lighter.

Note:  if mentally we are still mad on them, they still have a control over us.  Therefore, forget, forgive and let it go. By being mad, we only hurt ourselves.

I choose to surround myself with people who are amazing, creative, inspiring and empowering.  Yes, we all go through life’s hard stuff.  We all have our stories.  However, if some people choose to complain about it and do not do anything, it is a downer not only for them, but also for us.  We do not need to get into other people’s dramas.

Life is all about going higher and achieving our dreams.  Let’s surround ourselves with people who empower us to be the best.  Let’s be the best for others, too.  Let’s inspire one another.

Tags: being positive, friends, how to recognize a great friend, how to start over, inspiration, journal, life, no drama, opinion, people, personal, photo, picture, ramblings, random thoughts, reassesing relationships, reflections, relationships, self-confidence, self-esteem, sorting friends out, starting over, thoughts, women, wonderocity

How to Make Space for New?

Happy New Year!  It is a new beginning.  Like Winfrey Oprah said, “another year to make it right.”  The thing is that we go through changes many times:  it could be at a beginning of the year.  It could be after some drastic event happening, like changing a job, losing someone, divorce, kids go to college, retirement, marriage, moving to a new place, etc., etc.  There is also a saying that major changes usually happen after 7 years.

Lately, I and my friends are going through major life changes, too.  So, how to cope with that? How to make changes fun?  First of all, I found the greatest thing to do is to get rid of crap.  Through many years, we collect so much stuff.  Some things we liked before, we do not like it anymore.  Get rid of it.  Our tastes change.  We have so many e-mails that we did not even read, subscriptions that we ignore.  Delete and throw away.   If we take pictures, some pictures seemed nice before. Right now they’re mediocre – delete them or save them on DVD.  There are clothes that we did not wear for years – donate, give away or sell them.  There might be some unfinished projects or writings that we never get to finish, or lost interest in them – throw it away.

Also, not only we got to get rid of old, worn, unfinished stuff, but also the same goes with mental stuff.  All negativity out – to open a new space for positivity.  There might be some people that hurt us in the past.  Don’t you wish that some of them would have a “delete” button?  We can do it in our mind:  we got to forgive them and let it go.  Because if we are mad or upset, we only hurt ourselves – let go of anger and hurt.

Or, here is a brilliant idea:  Use these feelings to make you go higher.  Sometimes anger or being upset gives us a motivation to succeed.  We can channel those feelings to make ourselves only better and stronger.  If somebody said, “You’ll fail,” just say, “Watch Me” and strongly believe that you can do anything you wish and do it.

Also, while we clean old or bad energy out of our lives, we open doors to new opportunities.  The thing is that in this process of getting rid of the stuff, the new ideas come.  In working on these ideas, we got to communicate with people.  That’s how we start something new and exciting.

Moreover, we shall not take on a new crap.  If people do not treat us right or be negative, we have every right to walk away or change a subject.  We do not need their negativity in our lives.  Let’s surround ourselves with friends that lift us up, inspire us, and encourage us.  No more drama and no bullshit.  Also, no more excuses.

Tags: friends, Happy New Year, how to cope with a change, how to make space for new, how to start over, inspiration, journal, life, lifestyle, major life changes, new beginnings, opinion, past, people, personal, photo, picture, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, ramblings, random thoughts, reflections, relationships, self-confidence, self-esteem, starting over, thoughts, women, wonderocity

Go Big

“Go Big,” my brother suggested when I told him about my project idea, the book I started to write.  These simple words moved me.  The idea of being big was simmering in my mind just in the morning.  And there were those words again, “Go Big.”

This got me thinking.  How many of us play a small game?  How many of us play big?  How do we regard ourselves?  If we think we are small and insignificant, that’s what we give and therefore that’s what we receive in the world.  We play a small me part, what we think of is mostly about ourselves.  Sure, our dreams might be big, but as long as we concentrate only about ourselves, we will not going to go far.

So, how can we shift our perspective?  How can we live a bigger than ourselves life, play a bigger game?

First, let’s start from foundation that we built for ourselves.  All our life up till now made who we are today: our lessons, our tribulations, our victories, our difficulties, our winnings.  Whatever it was, we got to make a peace with our past: forgive, get rid of the stuff we no longer need.  Recently, I got rid of my journal writings that do not serve me anymore.  I think I kept them, so I would prove something to somebody.  I do not need to prove anything.  As I tore those pages, my heart became 100% lighter.  We do not need our past weighing on our shoulders and definitely we do not need to carry them someplace in the drawer tucked in.  We got to make a peace with our past and with ourselves.  If not, this stuff will haunt us in our future decisions and might stop us in the tracks.  We do not need that to go forward.  (To help deal with it, you can read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle and look into Landmark Education.  These are incredible resources.)

Next is to go for the dreams – no matter what.  Dream as big as we can dream of.  What’s the point of dreaming if you cannot dream big, right?  Dreaming alone will not get us anywhere, though.  We got to ACT on them.  Little by little, day by day, step by step – Act on the dreams.  Do not be afraid of failure.  Failure is just a stepping stone for something coming up great.  Need inspiration for action? Read Failing Forward by John C. Maxwell.  This will help you to be brave all the step of the way.

These two steps mentioned above are just a prep for a third and the most important step of going Big, Huge, Gigantic:  We got to INVOLVE as many people as we can – small people, big people and everything in between.  We cannot accomplish anything just by thinking small (all about ourselves).  As soon as we open the doors to others, help others, give others – we will start playing a bigger game – a world game.  Do we want to make a world a better place?  Let’s share our passions with it.  Can you imagine a world full of passionate people?  We have so much to give.  Why are we keeping all to ourselves?  We owe the world to show who we are, to help as many people as we can.  By helping others, we’ll help ourselves.  Let’s think for a moment in simple ways:  when we smile, others can’t help but smile back.  We water our flowers, and they smile back by giving us the most gorgeous blossoms.  We give a kind word to a stranger, their smile makes us feel good, too.  Universe works in mysterious ways.  The key to giving is not expect anything in return, but universe also gives it back as long as we are open in receiving.  Without expectation, we may be rewarded in other ways least expected.

So, let’s sum it all up.  Let’s get rid of the last pains, make a peace with our past.  Let’s build a new foundation of now and future by dreaming and DOING BIG!  Let’s involve and help as many people as we can.  Let’s think on worldly terms.  (Advanced Course of Landmark is a great resource of that).

Deepak Chopra, Tim Ferris, John Assaraf and other great authors are HUGE because they help tons of people.  Why am I any different? It is a time to play a BIG GAME.

Tags: act on dreams, actions, Advanced Course of Landmark Education, big dreams, book authors, books, change, communication, dreams, Eckhart Tolle, education, Failing Forward, how to start over, how to write a book, inspiration, involving, John C. Maxwell, Landmark education, life, mind, new opportunities, past, personal, photos, pictures, post and photos by Ineta McParland, reflections, self-confidence, self-improvement, starting over, The Power of Now, thinking, thoughts, wisdom, wonderocity, world, world a better place, worldly terms, writing, writings

How to unbreak (heal) our hearts?

Relationships and friendships come and go.  Sometimes we feel we put everything into it, but for some reason it is not working out.  We drift apart, and our hearts are broken.  Or are they?  Relationships and friendships might not work out, but our hearts keep beating.  They are strong and keep us alive.  Sure, they might hurt for awhile, if we let it.  We might start guarding our hearts by putting up the wall.  We think, “I’ll never get married again,” “I don’t want to get into relationship again,” “I will never trust anybody again.”  So, we lock our hearts away, put a huge protective wall and stop taking chances.  We tell ourselves, “We need time to ourselves,” or “We need time to heal.”  For some of us, it might take a short time, but for some of us it might take years to open up again.

So, when we think that our heart is broken, we carry with us our past hurts, a fear to be open again, a fear to be vulnerable.  Certainly, our hearts hurt because we carry with us all this baggage filled with hurtful memories, regrets, pain, anger, fears, what ifs, hopes, failed expectations.  Can you imagine life without all this heaviness?  Can you imagine heart feeling light?  It is possible.  It’s not easy, if we let our minds to control what we feel.  It is only possible if we get rid of all the past negativity through:

1) Forgiveness and letting it all go;

2) Letting our heart to feel what it wants to feel without mind interference;

3) Learning to love ourselves and focus on new possibilities.

Forgiveness…  Oh, I can now hear the protests, “But he or she did so and so!” Do you know that by carrying grudge, anger, or sadness and reliving painful moments, we only hurt ourselves?  It does not affect the person that hurt us.  It only affects us and our hearts.  So why torture ourselves with that?  The next thought:  What if that person who hurt us did not know any better given their own life experiences, or lack of?  There is no way this is an excuse, but from their point of view and circumstances, they thought they are right, they needed to be in control, or they might not be aware that they hurt us.  We are not in their shoes.  Therefore, we can not understand them where they were coming from at the time.  We all deal with stuff in our own ways.  Forgiveness is not for the sake of other person and does not excuse for the way they wronged us.  Forgiveness is a strength.  It is letting go what happened in the past, and not letting to affect us and our decisions in the now.  Can you imagine your heart free?  That’s the way to go.  Let it all be left in the past and not the present and the future.

Once we got rid of the past headaches, we will feel our hearts filled with so much love:  love for family, friends, animals, nature, LIFE.  The key is not to let our minds to control what we feel.  If the mind remind us about being hurt and if we concentrate on that hurt, it might bring the same situation we been before.  Now, if we trust our hearts and let it feel, it might lead us into a new love.

By opening our hearts to life, we open ourselves to new possibilities, new ways to experience things.  Our hearts never wrong us if we only really listen to them closely.  We are born with a “hunch,” with “inner knowing.”  Sometimes all we need is to quiet our minds, to hear it.

The third way how to heal our hearts is to learn to love ourselves, to accept ourselves the way we are.  I do not say to be conceited, like “Look who I am.”  To love ourselves means to know what we want in life and go for it, to be the best we can be and share our passions and talents with the world, to establish who we are regardless of others’ expectations.  Once we learn to love ourselves, we will attract love and respect of others.  We will be strong to recognize environment and people who are harmful to us.  Therefore, we will not get into bad situations.  Once our heart is filled with love, we’ll concentrate on just that.  That’s how we will attract love to ourselves by giving love and care to others.

Tags: forgiveness, health, heartbreak, how to heal our hearts, how to start over, how to unbreak our hearts, inspiration, life, love, men, new love, new possibilities, opinion, people, personal, photos, pictures, post and photos by Ineta McParland, reflections, relationships, romance, self love, thoughts, women, wonderocity

How to Start Over?

We all have major changes in our lives when we need to start over.  It could be losing a job, losing a relationship, moving, or as simple as starting a new year, a week.  Each day can be a start over, too, if we choose.

Starting over is not easy for some of us.  We do not even know how to do it.  We feel lost.  We keep falling into traps that keeps us in the known, familiar, comfort (even when we hate it).  So, what does it take to get out of these traps?  How to go forward and create life we wish?

First, let’s identify the traps.  They usually are:

1) Looking back

2) What ifs

3) Victimhood

4) Attachment

5) Fear and resistance to change

These traps are usually intertwined, and it is not easy to get out.  One leads to another, and we feel trapped like in a spider web, feeling paralyzed with fear.  So, how to untangle ourselves?  How to use these traps to our advantage?

First, we often can’t help but look back.  Oh, memories…  “Those were good old days,” or “He or she is such a jerk.”  Positive or negative, our necks probably hurt from keep turning back.  This is the past, and we got to make a peace with it.  “The Past is Powerless” like Eckhart Tolle said in his book The Power of Now.   It does not affect us at this moment.  Only we affect ourselves by our own thoughts that we choose to have.  Nothing is wrong with remembering.  It only becomes hurtful if we choose to “relive” the bad.  Why torture ourselves?  When memory comes, we just got to let it go and think to ourselves, “This thought does not do any good for me.”  We can choose to have any thoughts and memories if we stay in the now.  Like in Landmark Education, I learned a phrase, “How can you drive forward, if you are looking back in rear-view mirror at all the times?”

Looking back also entails “what ifs.” What if we should have done that differently?  What if I’ll stay single forever? What if I’m too old to date?  What if I’m not going to find another job?  What ifs never end if we let it.  What ifs are only what ifs.  It is mumbo jumbo of our over-analyzing mind and most of it is just a waste of time thinking and it is fear-driven.  If something is doable, let’s do it.  Other than that, let’s concentrate on our Now and future right at this minute.

Once we end a bad relationship or quit a bad job, we can’t help but feel victim.  So and so treated us badly, and we keep reliving our past.  Once again, we look back with resentment, regrets, anger, sadness, etc.  We are responsible for our own thoughts, so why we want to suffer again?  Plus, we did not realize back then that we are strong.  We felt as a victim instead.  That’s why people mistreated us.  If we would not allow ourselves to be a victim and be strong, we would not fall in this situation in the first place.  We live and learn.  So, let’s be strong, stand up for ourselves and never be or feel victim again.

The next trap is attachment.  We love familiar.  Some of us hate or afraid of change so much, we are willing to stay in any situation, even when it is detrimental to us.  That’s why we keep coming back to the same situations over and over again.  It is our state of mind that keep us trapped.  We cling to familiar and to known.  We hate our jobs, but we stay there because of our steady paycheck, benefits, everything is familiar.  We stay in bad relationship, hoping things will change for the better, but it never does.  It is familiar, and we do not know how to get out.  We attach ourselves to jobs, people, familiarity.  Change is always good.  Let’s re-program our minds and go for what we want.  If something is not working , we got to let it go and look for alternative.  We are worth all the best.  Therefore, we should not settle for anything less.  If we overcome fear of change, and challenge ourselves in unfamiliar territories, we will learn so much new.  We will get unstuck from our past, and starting over will feel like a new adventure, a new life we are worth living.

Now let’s imagine our new life.  We have an empty canvas, or a sheet of paper.  What colors we will choose?  What words we will write?  What pictures we will create?  It is all up to us.

Tags: attachment, best seller, changes in life, Eckhart Tolle, entrapment, fear, fear of change, how to start over, inspiration, kittens, Landmark education, life, links, looking back, losing job, losing relationship, love, men, moving, opinion, people, philosophy, photo, picture, reflections, relationships, resistance to change, starting over, starting over traps, The Power of Now, thoughts, victimhood, what ifs, women, wonderocity

How to Come Out of the Shell?

Many of us in life get hurt.  Our hearts get broken, and we close ourselves in the shell.  Sometimes we come out of it, and get smacked over the head, and we go back into the shell again.  Some of us stay closed in for the most part of our lives.

In our minds we feel safe, unhurt, comfortable in our shells, so why bother to risk?  Why to risk to get hurt again?  What we do not realize is that by staying inside our shells, we miss out on life big time.  We miss out on new opportunities, new ways of life.  So, how to come out of this shell?  How to stop this vicious cycle?  We got to find out why we are in the shell in the first place.  It could be one or all these reasons:

1.  Our heart is broken and we need time to heal.

2.  We think we are not worth it.

3.  We think we are not good enough.

4.  We do not want to get hurt again.

5.  Any other reason.

If our heart is broken, there is nothing wrong to take time off to heal.  It might take months or even years to rebuild our heart from the scratch.  It is different for every person.  Only we can choose how much time we need.  It is all in our minds.  As long as we do not close ourselves forever, we can take as much time as we have to.  The problem would occur if we choose to be in the shell as our way of life or reason one becomes reason 2, 3, 4 and maybe 5, which are a plain nonsense.  We usually look at outside world for confirmation for who we are.  If we do not know our true selves or we do not see who we are for ourselves, the outside world can give us every stupid opinion.  It can turn us in whatever direction they want, and we believe in it.  If somebody tell us that we are ugly, stupid, fat, idiots, we believe them.  We will start seeing that we are not worth it and we are not good enough, and we will close ourselves in the shell.

Now if we have a firm belief who we are and do not look for acceptance in outside world, no matter who will say anything to us, we will just laugh at them and think they are nuts.

In other way, if we are closed in our shelves, nobody will know who we truly are.  We will not be able to show who we are to others allowing them to make wrong assumptions about us.  When they do, we get hurt because we know it is not true.

The only way out of it is to get to know ourselves and stand our ground and show the world who we are, and get people really to know us.  By sharing us and our gifts with the world, we will not give a chance for people to make wrong assumptions about us.

If we choose to be closed in, we will miss out on the world and the world will miss out on us.  We are too good and too important to hide.

Tags: being brave, friends, heartbreak, how to come out of the shell, how to heal a broken heart, hurt, inspiration, life, lifestyle, love, men, new opportunities, opinion, outside world, people, personal, philosophy, photo, picture, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, rants, reflections, relationships, sharing our gifts, thoughts, time to heal, women, wonderocity

How to make a peace with your past?

How many times do we make trips to our past?  Ah, memories.  Some of them are sweet, bring a smile to our faces, warm our hearts.  “Those were the good old days, ” we sight.  However, for some of us the past was not that sweet.  We cringe even thinking about it.  It haunts us like a bad nightmare.  We carry it with us like the heaviest baggage; or we bury those memories in the back of our minds.  We lock them and we loose the key.  Our minds shut it off and we forget, until something triggers, and we find ourselves in pain again.

What to do with this haunting hurtful past?  How to make it all to go away?  How to start a new?

To go on, we need to make a peace with our past.  It is not easy.  It might take a moment, months or even years.  We got to be ready for it.  It is something we can not push it.  It depends what eats away at us, and severity of it.  Possibilities could be:

1) regrets;

2) sorrow;

3) people

Regrets usually come equipped with “what ifs.”  What if I would have done it differently?  Each of us have different experiences in our lives.  If we chose to be one way, that means we were not experienced enough to make different choices back then.  We all make mistakes.  That’s what is learning all about:  it gives us lessons and new experiences.  Now we know better from it.  We cannot change our past, only now and the future.  Because of those mistakes, now we can make better choices which we should be grateful for.  There is no use to have regrets about our past decisions, when we can make a better ones now.

We lose someone we love, or someone leaves us.  In our lives, people and pets come and go.  Instead of concentrating of losing them, we should be grateful that they were a big part that touched our lives.  We should feel fortunate to know them and love them.  Each person and animal leave a footprint in our hearts, and we are better because of them.

Then, we meet people who hurt us, betray us, even in some cases abuse us.  These memories could linger for the longest time if we let them.  It keeps hurting us when we look back as if it is still happening now.  That’s where a beautiful thing comes in – being in control of our minds.  We can stop our memories at any time.  Bad thoughts and remembering do not serve us.  It only gives us a headache.  Anger does not serve us either; it only hurts us.  Each person we meet bring something to us:  lessons needed to be learned, a cause of being a stronger person, new experiences.  We might not seen it then, but after time, we can find the reasons why we encountered these people, no matter what painful experiences we had.  The key to these negative situations is to never feel like a victim.  Going back and remembering is like putting ourselves in “victim” mode over and over again.  Now there will be a time where remembering will not affect us that anymore – then the true healing begins.

We all have our minds.  Therefore, we can choose to have thoughts.  If we choose to be angry, depressed, resentful, we only hurt ourselves with our thoughts, and we may even reflect that on our loved ones and not be aware of it.  Now if we choose to make a peace with our past, knowing that past stays in the past, and we only can change now and future, we open ourselves to new possibilities and experiences.  We know that we do not need to make the same mistakes again and let anybody treat us badly.  We can start a new without heavy baggage of our past.

Tags: anger, depression, healing, health, how to go on?, how to let go, how to make a peace with your past, how to make peace with past, hurtful past, hurting, inspiration, life, love, men, opinion, past, people, personal, philosophy, photo, picture, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, random thoughts, rants, reflections, regrets, relationships, resenting, sorrow, suffering, thoughts, what ifs, women, wonderocity

The Comfort Trap

“Hi, how are you?”

“I’m fine. How about you?”

“I’m O.K.”

“Anything new in your life?”

“No. How about you?”

“The same old.”

Sounds familiar?  Ooh, we are such a creatures of habit.  We love our dull routines.  We get so used to them, that even we love to hate them.  We LOVE comfort. We love familiar.  We love what we know and we do what we can to stay in the comfort zone.  What is unfamiliar is scary.  What we often do not realize is that in unfamiliarity we can find freedom – freedom from conditioning, freedom from the past.  Yes, ankles might shake from the fear of unknown, but in that unknown we’ll find something new to learn, something new and exciting to talk about, something new to experience.

What if we would take a new route home?  What if we would visit a new place that we never been before?  What if we would meet new people?  What if we would stop comparing new people we meet with our exes and the past?  How our life would look like if we would look at it from the new perspective?  Would we come alive?  We certainly would.  Now, if we would find time to follow our passions? Schedule them, if we have to.  Our lives would be so enriched.  We are worth it!  We are worth to live lives we desire.  Our daily routines are just excuses to be in the comfort – in the known.

There is enriched life that is waiting for us if we are brave enough to cross the line and free ourselves from the comfort trap.  The unknown is like a blank piece of paper – we can fill it with any colors we want, we can choose any words or it can become any shape in origami form.  It is our source of creativity.  What you choose your life to be?

Tags: changing life for better, comfort trap, fear, fear of unknown, friends, inspiration, life, opinion, people, personal, photo, post and photo by Ineta Mcparland, random thoughts, reflections, routines, thoughts, uncertainty, wonderocity

How Our Minds Create Our Reality?

Everyday we are governed by our thoughts.  Our thoughts project our reality.  The thoughts transfer then into actions, whether we are aware of it or not.

First, where does our thinking come from?  What it is based on?  Why we think the way we think?  Most of it consist of what we read, what we heard, what we learned.  Most of our thoughts are based on our past, that is familiar to us.  That’s why it is so hard to break away from mistakes we keep making.  We fall into the same trap, being aware of it or not.

For example, why some women or men fall repeatedly into abusive relationships?  Unconsciously, that’s familiar to them.  They do not know any better.  Why it is so hard to break bad habits? We think, we always done it that way – our mind keeps us hostage.  Why we keep our job even though we hate it? – it is familiar.  We justify that we got good insurance, great benefits, but each morning comes and we dread to go to work.  Days become years, and we are stuck being unhappy.  Some days are better than others, but deep inside we know we deserve better – yet we do not do anything about it.

We want to change so badly.  We promise ourselves “some day,” yet we keep going like the mouse in the wheel, and we get nowhere.

So, how to get unstuck?  How to re-condition our minds to go where we want to go, to achieve what we want to achieve?  How to get away from the past?

How about if we keep our past just for a reference to keep the lessons we learned?  That’s it.  As for present and future, let’s step into unfamiliar zone as often as possible.  What we think is what our reality is.

Another example:  If we think we cannot find our eyeglasses, we will search everywhere, even though they’re in our hand.  Now, if we concentrate in finding them, then we’ll find them instantly.  The same is with life.  If we think, we cannot do something, we’ll not even going to try it.  Now, if we think we can do it, we might end up doing it better than we previously thought.  We might surprise ourselves.  We got to step into unfamiliar, do new things, think in different ways – to recondition our minds that we can do anything we desire.

If we are stuck in abusive relationship, first, we got to change our mentality that we are worth only the best, and either stand up for ourselves or leave, or both.  In some instances, we might need help in that.  No person should be ever abused.

If we want to break free from a bad habit, we got to imagine us to be healthy, successful, honest, etc., whatever it might be, opposite from a bad habit – and condition our minds to take action toward it.

If we hate our jobs, think of this, “Life is too short to be unhappy, ” and take actions to change it.  We may need to save up for our new venture, or still work there until our hobby will take off to full time venture.  However, with our goal in mind we can now tolerate our jobs because we know it is only temporary.  Or, if we’re prepared, we can quit now, and go after our dreams now without waiting.

The key is to shift our minds and think positive.  We got to keep our minds on the target goal and go for it even it is not familiar or we’re afraid.  That’s where thinking positive comes in.  When we think positive, we are not easily let down and we see end results and go for them no matter what.  Sure, there might be things in the way, but with our shifted positive thinking, we can think outside the box and find solutions.  It’s all in our minds whether we can or cannot do.  Let’s choose, we can do it and act on it now.

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